Hummingbird Hates Women
Now, I’m no
I doubt any ‘top 100 male songs’ list would consist mainly of Boyz II Men or Will Young tunes, so the fact that the likes of Lady Gaga have floated to the top of this one is somewhat patronizing; more so than the Triple J Hottest 100 of All Time list which, despite excluding all female artists, is a pretty damn good list. Hummingbird have successfully represented female music as poppy, inane and devoid of any real substance; it might as well be entitled ‘top 100 songs for those with no taste’.
Here’s my main gripe: Bjork, who must surely stand as the most innovative, exciting and intelligent female artist of the last twenty years (as well as the most thrilling live performer still regularly doing the rounds) does not even feature. Not once. No Play Dead, no Innocence, not even Its Oh So Quiet. Nothing.
You will also struggle to find Janis Joplin. Annie Lennox is not there. Neither is Courtney Love, or Joan Jett. Not even Nina Simone, the epitome of the talented, tortured female vocalist, features on this most diabolical of inventories. Nina fucking Simone!
You know who does feature? Media manipulator Lady Gaga, talent-free-zone Lily Allen and Katy fake lesbian for fame Perry. Beyonce Knowles features in this list SEVEN times all in, as a solo artist or with Destiny’s Child. Now, I don’t want to go on about my feelings regarding her, so let me just put it this way: a woman who’s music makes up 14% of the ‘top 100 female songs’ used the line “if you like it then you should have put a ring on it” in one of her recent songs. That’s either a big old kick in the tits for every single, independent woman, or the best reference to the use of cock rings in a pop song ever.
I suppose its not all bad though. At least Blondie make three appearances, and the spectacular voice of Christina Aguilera matched that. So what if Regina Spektor couldn’t climb above #90, and Amy Winehouse, the best, most fucked-up blues voice of our generation, only snuck in near the bottom? So what if Portishead and Kate Bush only got one look in, and even Dolly Parton nearly missed out altogether? That’s just the way it goes, isn’t it?
Well no, quite frankly, it’s not.
Any woman with a sense of self-respect won’t take this diss lying down. It seems obvious to me that one of three things is happening here:
1) Women are shit at music
2) Women have voted for this and made a mockery of themselves
3) The music industry is still a huge patriarchy, forcing women into set roles in order to achieve success, and ignoring those that don’t.
Perhaps its all three at work, but considering the number of talented females I know (see Chicks with Picks) I think its much more likely to be a combination of the last two.
We’ll be posting the Bleeding Ears ‘Alternative Hot 100 Female Songs’ list soon, so keep ‘em peeled kids.
In the mean time, come on ladies, show some dignity. Get angry, and show the music world what you’ve got.
“Hummingbird Hates Women”